Finally, she confronted her Monster.
She strolled down her block, crossed two streets and at the corner right in front, a white towering building she’d avoided for weeks now. A place she’d run away from on her third visit since Wendy, her psychology professor at the college introduced her to this self-help group centre. Today she feels nothing but certitude of a momentous end. To halt this draining trips down these streets every thursday evening. Armed to face a grievous guest who un-warrantly moved in, not even on a damn permit. A gruesome thing she’d survived all her barely quarter lifespan. She got one exit a window, just like Homeland’s merlin The runaway princess asked CIA’s Berenson for a window of light, before indulging her enamored fate. Or should i compare to Tokyo’s small chalk-drawn window that made her a deli queen. A created window seem a solution enough. In her case she had to create her own.Wendy: Thankyou everyone for making it to today’s session. I know how much effort each of you made to be here. As you know this is the safest place ever, no judgements at all. This is our safe space.
Her: (Showing up last) Hi…
Wendy: (Wowed to see her) Good to see you back, welcome! You wanna share your experience with us?
Her: (In her mind she stands up, kicks her seat back and just owning her moment).
“I hate i had to be a victim of your atrocities. I hate i signed up for a life so cloggy, my sight as everything else foggy. Covered in Mist i cannot wade through, with a vision blur enough to blend white and Black. I hate i was an easy host to a genuine imposter whom i let reside within. A fraud that would render my young life a turmoil. I hate i was never cautious of your pseud-ness. You approached as a Shadowman with delusional neverland stories i bought. I hate that i allowed you in bed with me, i let you fuck my brains and take away my sanity. You covered me in black sheets of illusions, and bound my soul to your darkness. Invaded my brightside, bind my eyelids so you shut my beautiful world. I hate i let you crown me a tiara of cynicism and pronounced me crazy the queen of Anxiety.I hate i had to feed you endless bottles of Benzodiazepine to bribe you of my sanity, and sparingly wasted weekly 3hours of unworthy credits explaining how perfectly you churn my insides at self -help groups. You paid handsomely for the branding of my name weirdo for normalcy to you is overrated and your fond of stealing it. You anti-social monster, turned me a ‘space cadet’ kept me away from my peers and visciouly robbed my childhood. A good liar who advised me on the awfulness of a good world, taught me resentment and dimmed my galaxy. Not even Hitler’s atrocious eugenic policies of the radical psychologists who experimented on children of schloss Hochenstein would seduce me to death like you tried. Your evil strategies to cause me tragedies now has remedies. For i’m over you now!
For your dispelled from my northern hemisphere and floated off my organic spaceship, just like the 100’s chancellor Jaha would award his criminals in 13th space nation. Sending you to your blackhole where you emerged. I hate it took me this long to confront you, but this moment…this moment…the last you’ll hear from me. For i’m crashing you now, for all the bridges you created are burning out. For all the locks and walls you caged me in are breaking down. For i’m cutting loose all the chains you bound my limbs in. For i spat the rag you gagged my mouth with. For have removed all the Tarantula’s strings & strands you webbed my mind on. For your carcharodon blades don’t scare me anymore. For my wings are off the voracious vine, the evil kudzu Japanese weed that ate Dixie. For my blind fold is off, my vision crystal. For i can tell white from black, reality in fantasy and pick a truth over a coated truth. For i topped my game and luring me is like asking Pinnochio to lie willingly. For my mind mend, sight sharp, wings waxed and i’m soaring higher. For my garden has blossomed, Daisies, Roses, Tulips, Lilies wafting scents after me. My vinery breaking its banks and the Alfaalfa in my meadows dancing to the winds. The winds swift and waves calm. The sun warm and the breeze anaesthetic. For my soul restored and my purpose liveth. Goodbye monster, for we’ll never cross paths again. You helpless manipulative loser is back to where you belong. A bottomless pit, where i safely ditch you”.
Wendy: (perplexed) Are you going to say something…you’ve been starring in the space for long…
Her: (Zoning back) Yeah…and for i don’t need self-help groups but myself. For none of you is broken, that monster inside is. For your powerful than you think, stand up against it. For it’s a coward raking the insides of your head. For it’s a dreadful dreamkiller. Only you can stand against it and deny it access to your main switch. For confessing on how insane it drives you only credits it. For it switches positions and takes control of you. For safe space only exists within you, find it back. Just confront! Confront! Confront! Set yourself free. For i’m free now! Thankyou Wendy, adìos.(She gets up and exits).